Tuesday 24 February 2009

Alert! Dusun People New generation's need some guidance.







What really matters? What really shows the virtue of a true color or anything that gives you the right to claim your heritage??? Hereby said, a spot where all question should be asked.

Lets go through it together.




I can’t help but share all my thoughts and also my fellow mates that actually had the same opinion as I do about this.

I am really proud to be Dusun Kadazan girl. Its one of the most unique Ethnic race in the world. Everything about it makes me proud. But nevertheless, theres always something that makes me feel like something is twisting my guts whenever I think about it.

It symbolized honor, trust and unconditional Love they say... It brings people together they say .... Nurture the mind of the youngster they say…. Yeah right! Its basically a Dog eat Dog world. Ahaaa.. if you don’t know what I am talking about let me give you a clue ..
Unduk Ngadau… as I like to call it Unduks!

It’s a cut throat industry. Its not just a simple celebration that symbolized the importance of tradition anymore. Sad to say, yes… its now a rat race.

I have been there and yes… its full of shit and more bullshit. Its not the concept of unduk ngadau im talking about… It’s the people who involved in it… I am not goin to specify who it is .. but hey not that nobody didn’t know about all this. Lets just call them “THEY”

When I said I have been there, I mean.. I have been there. Going through 3 times in a month, different places. For sure, I was already part of foul play. But I would like to mention this though. It might’ve been the worst time I have ever gone through, but it is also the Best I had. The knowledge I gained from it…( Which I actually made a mission for myself) was unbelievably awesome.

But what I noticed about the whole thing was, “They” just talk cock!.First they say every rules that they can think of for hours! And then what? They tried to squeeze people in without even looking twice into the rules anymore.
That’s Bullshit no 1. Rules and regulation? – Flush in the toilet!

Bullshit no 2? –Mama’s baby. Have you seen before a girl who’s always on every pageant and always have a place on every one of them …. If not to win but to at least get an amount of prize money? Heheh yeah .. that happened to. At the big day itself, someone dropped out and making the story shorter, mama squeeze baby in. And I saw parents showing their dissatisfaction towards all the committee because their daughter (Whom by the way came to the audition day didn’t even get the slot) that was embarrassing indeed. But then “they” have thick faces.

You know when they say everyone must know how to speak the language? We’ll I gotta admit, I don’t speak that well .. Nope nope nope …. Why ??? ask my parents … hahhah
Anyways I think some people are very lucky indeed to have the chance to learn it properly. For me? Well I am one of the unfortunate one I guess.. I didn’t have the privilege to learn it. Don’t get me wrong I understand it… Just not fluent in it. I look up to the young generation who can actually speak fluently in Dusun Kadazan Murut.

But the next point I am bringing up is, Bullshit no 3 – they can talk, but can they walk the talk. Before I continue, I would like to go to the Lagend about the infamous Huminodun. The girl that everyone want’s to be… well with the crown in their heads anyways.
Huminodun sacrificed herself so that her people won’t starve to death. Legend says, rice started to grow on where her body was laid to rest. So that’s why we have the unduk ngadau pageant. To represent the people of the Dusun Kadazan Murut on a glorious celebration of Harvest Festival.

I know I know .. where I am going with this ??? well … imagine you’re all starving to death… and your huminodun is not capable even to clean the fish or cook rice before…
Hahhahahhah … Not laughing? I think its funny hahhahha..

Let me just share this one particular story for you. I went to a teen retreat once, and I heard this two guys talking on my back in Dusun about me. They said that I am a Dusun girl, but I cant speak the language for shit. And then I turned to them speaking in Bahasa, I said to them that they should be careful what they’re saying to people because I might not be fluent but I can understand them. And I asked them if they even set foot in the rice field before. Judging me… at least I know everything to know about being a real Dusun …. Kima! Ops!

Anyways, back to the point there. Yes! Most of these Huminodun wanabe’s dnt even have a clue of how mud smells like … I don’t understand some parents don’t even care about this things anymore. It’s not that I like it when my mum forced me to learn all this thing. But thank God she did, that’s priceless now.

Apa gia tu cerita tu ?? yang ndak sudah kanal bambangan sama pandai sudah kunun gali mau makan bosou …. Yoi! Ndak sadar diri …. Dulu dungot pun kana tila. Banyak lagi tu cerita tu pasal urg dusun mudah lupa kaka….

Well here.. I am not only offering some sense to you, but also a solution that we can all use.
The line is…. Back to Basic.

It means …. Instead of looking how they walk the cat walk … or how high their hair do or how pretty they are when they put on make up … I would rather judge by their personal character and their skills….skills that represent our culture.


Culinary Skills
Parut Kalapa style dulu dulu ( coconut grating) – my mum said that on the olden days the mother in-laws will see if a girl could grate the coconut in a traditional ways and get the juice out from the pulp to see if they are ready to take care of the house hold.

Masak nasi pakai gas (Cooking rice manually)- Basic thing …. If they don’t win .. at least they know how to cook rice … hehhe

Masak makanan tradisi ( Traditional cuisine ) – If you don’t know how to do this… don’t even bother!

How much do you know
If the normal activities in normal pageant to go and visit the museum or the orphanage.. well try this …. Get yourself dirty ….. lets see if you know how to plant rice/ harvest rice. That’s the main reason you wanna be Huminodun in the first place.
Full on! I love it!

And fishing trip with worms…. Meniud borot di sungai ( don’t actually know how to translate that)

One night stay in the Traditional Long houses with just minimal facilities.

NO SHORTCUT
I also banned short cuts… I will not have any culprits who will ruin this thing for their own benefits. This event should be embraced as United People… don’t stab each other back. If there’s any judges who is not reliable … BANNED!


I know I might sound extreme with all this.. but I am so concerned to see all the girls that I was with in the pageant when I last participate, all they can think about how to get the crown and the person who is standing next to you is a n enemy and I can feel that there’s nothing sincere on what they say, do or think anymore….I was really scared shitless.. Can anyone imagine someone was trying so hard to Not fall asleep on stage? Hahahh that was me. I realized this thing is not for me. But its unfortunate that most girls thinks that this is only a run for the crown! I mean, am I the only one that thinks it’s more than that ??? and tried to make the experiences maxed! Like making their own costume until their fingers all messed up with cuts !? Oh wait…I am the only crazy one who did that.
Girls…. Why should you even see the girl next to you is your enemy? Oh don’t lie.. I know ! I tried to be friends with everyone … but everyone is so pose that they don’t even wanna smile til they hit the stage! Urgh!


Anyways… yes that’s what I think of this whole thing. The Organizing have to change guys. It ruins the mind of the new generation. And I am sad to say that’s the only thing I am ashamed of. But I am grateful for all the experiences that I gained throughout the pageant…. Made new friends.. and swore never to get my ass into it ever again !

I hope my message will come across… I know I sound like I am babbling most of the time… But then again I am seriously concerned about all this … like the saying “don’t judge a book by its cover” nothing seems solid till you dig into it.

Last but not least .. .bah palan palan kio ….




Monday 23 February 2009

Summary of a new year .....Starts now...


So .... what has been goin on so far for the 2009 for me ? Well ..... not that much ... but somethings here and there ....

I finally got the urge to get in touch with my music again ... starting to write new songs with inspiration rolling in and all ... and I intended to update my blog awhile ago... never got the chance to... But now I am here ... just letting my thought flow and my fingers do the typing.

I basicly dont even know what to say .... as far as I realized, whenever I thought my life was interestingn enough that I should write something about it, it became dull and uninteresting. Probably its because, some things are better to be left unsaid.

This year I welcome a new member of the family. Ivan Jovic Victor Suan. I've only met him once.. and havent really got to know him or anything .... yet. But soon hopefully, when he can actually remember who I am and knows who's the famous "Untie Pet" hehheh ..

And so here he is .... still red and "blur".....

Anyways. ... Theres nuthing much to tell yet ..... but so far I am just waiting for that certain time to get into something and actually looking forward to suprise myself rather than anyone really.

I hope to go on inspiring myself to write more melodies and send them all to my ex Producer Greg Handerson back in KL so he can have a listen and tell me what he thinks .... So far, one has got his green light and I was so thrilled to have his opinion in this ...


Anyways, oh yeah .... and I also bought a new Handycam ! I know right ......Cooolll..... Its not that impressive of an idea... but hey! finally! I get to own one! I am sooooooo exited.... i can immagine things that I canto with it..... so cool ! hehehhe


Right now my new lappy was not very friendly to me.... I have tried installing some software inside and I cant do it! *&#&*^%&^%!^%!@ but anyways.. I gotta do something about that .... man! I cant live without my photoshop and illustrator .... :( I think its the stoopid Vista ... but hey.. what do I know.


This year I turned to 26th. And I wonder how much I have changed and grown so far. My birthday celebration wasn't that grand ... but I have few special people that I invited to come and be with me ... just have some dinner and some Sabahan style Kareoke session. I guess it doesn't really matter to me anyway. turning into an older age is just a time where we remember and try to figure out reasons to be in this world. A timed alarm clock to wake us up when were sleeping and dreaming in living life, that sometimes dont mean a thing or leading us no where .... Its scary but its true.... Sometimes you wake u and you dont even know where you are .
About my cooking and baking progress..... hmmmm I can make damn good Pizza Now ! and My chocolate cake is to die for ahahhaahaha .... alamak ! naik bakul angkat sendiri la pula!
Latest update for "First time ever Listing" - saw my first ever Tennis Match .... Venus Williams, Jelena Jankovic, Ana Ivanovic, and others that i cant remember their names .. hehehhe that was awesome! I didnt think that I qould actually enjoy it! But I did! .. coooooll... Bought myself First Timberland Shoes, Seen the snow.... and March is coming and here I come for my first Skiing Trip, Experience and Meeting the Family.
Till then everyone ... keep tuning t my blog... I will update as soon as I am inspired to... Cherios!